13 Types of Bosses and How to Make Them Love You
Alice Handley and Kayla Baxter
Along with paychecks, deadlines, and overtime, bosses are one of the things you just can’t avoid in the workplace. But how to identify these strange characters and deal with them? Don’t go it alone — it’s a jungle out there. We show you how!
1. The Robot
Distinguishing characteristics: An empty desk, no family pictures.
What they do: All business, all the time: That’s The Robot.
We’re not saying she’s not human, but we’ve definitely got our doubts on
the matter sometimes. The sworn enemy of fun, levity, and emotion, The
Robot would rather you just get to work. At all times. While it can be
nice to have someone driving you to do your best, it would be nice to
feel a little bit of emotional connection from time to time, right?
How to make her love you: It may not sound like a lot of fun,
but you’ll probably have to conceal your own feelings and buckle down to
The Robot’s schedule. On the up side, she can teach you discipline and
efficiency. Try making allies of your coworkers. They’re probably as
frustrated as you are! Inside jokes and friendly chit-chat can make the
day seem brighter.
2. The Softy
Distinguishing characteristics: Second chances.
What they do: They think they’re making things easier on their
employees, but in the long run The Softy’s kid-glove approach to
management just makes it harder for great workers to succeed and easier
for slackers to stick around. Being a boss involves making difficult
decisions sometimes, especially when it comes to employees, but The
Softy doesn’t seem to realize this.
How to make him love you: The worst thing to do is hurt The
Softy’s feelings, so try changing things up by commending them on his
toughest calls, however rare. A little positive reinforcement can go a
long way when The Softy learns that being the bad cop doesn’t have to be
the worst job in the world.
3. The Weasel
Distinguishing characteristics: Empty promises
What they do: Promising one thing but delivering another, The Weasel will say anything — and we do mean anything
— to get what she wants out of you. A raise? A promotion? Some time
off? Sure, you’ll get what you’ve been dreaming about eventually if you
take on extra work or a hellish new project. Or so she says, but we
wouldn’t recommend holding your breath for The Weasel to actually
deliver. Why should she? You’re already doing the extra work for free.
How to make her love you: Completing all the grunt work will
get you great distances with The Weasel, but just remember to trust
nothing The Weasel says, ever. Or, at very least, get it in writing and
double-check with whomever The Weasel answers to in upper management. A
paper trail will be your best defense against lies and false promises.
Maybe you’ll actually get that promotion!
4. The Mystery
Distinguishing characteristics: Closed doors, Out Of Office messages.
What they do: Who knows? The Mystery is an expert at the arts
of subterfuge, denial, and … whatever it is he does. Either he’s on a
business trip or in a locked-door meeting or plotting world domination
all day or … something. Whatever it is, you’re left to your own devices
to figure things out, minus any guidance at all. Too bad you’ll still be
on the hook if things go wrong. The Mystery will be gone when it comes
down to it.
How to make him love you: Wait it out and give him space. If
you stay patient (and we mean really patient) you may be able, like a
persevering biologist in the jungle observing shy animals, to learn a
little bit more about The Mystery’s habits.
5. The Viper
Distinguishing characteristics: Backhanded compliments, fake smiles.
What they do: Does The Viper wake up on the wrong side of the
bed every single morning? It sure seems like it. From snippy comments
about personal matters (“Are you pregnant? Oh, it just seemed like you
were gaining weight.”) to undermining your efforts at work (“So you’re
just learning Excel, right?”), The Viper has a real talent for making
you feel bad about yourself. No matter how thick your skin is, it’s hard
not to let her get to you.
How to make her love you: We’re not actually certain that the
Viper is capable of loving an employee, so it’s probably best to just
stay a good distance away from her. Keep feelings to yourself, and
share as little information about your life as possible, all the while
being extremely pleasant. The Viper can’t hurt you if she doesn’t know
where you’re sensitive.
6. The Buddy
Distinguishing characteristics: Baseball caps, high-fives
What they do: The Buddy wants to be your friend, not your
boss. Too bad for him you’ve already got friends and wouldn’t want to
hang with him anyway. From “happy” hours that seem more like a
punishment to unfunny jokes that you’ve just got to laugh at (or else!)
The Buddy really has a way of making fun into a chore. And don’t get us
started on his habit of trying to start questionable relationships with
subordinates. It’s just painful to watch.
How to make him love you: Laugh at his funnier jokes, but don’t stoop to laughing at every
joke – being a suck-up isn’t a great way to maintain your dignity. Say
no thanks to all the invitations you can, and keep your own
interactions with The Buddy on an extremely professional level – you’ll
be helping him in the long run, and he’ll respect you for it. Protect
yourself with a thick layer of decorum and common sense, because he sure
isn’t going to do it for you.
7. The Miracle
Distinguishing characteristics: An office that looks like yours, encouraging emails
What they do: Fun, supportive, capable, and inspiring, The
Miracle is truly an employee’s dream come true. She does what she says,
always follows up, and usually can push you to do your best in a way
that makes the hardest work seem like play. If you’re working for The
Miracle you’ll know it, from the smile on your face at the end of the
day to your rewarding paycheck at the end of the week. Just try not to
brag too much!
How to make her love you: Work your butt off and thank your
lucky stars, since The Miracle doesn’t come along very often. Use this
great opportunity to really see how far you can go, and at the end of
The Miracle’s tenure, make sure you get a letter of reference!
8. The Monster
Distinguishing characteristics: Thrown coffee cups, restraining orders
What they do: The question is more “What don’t they do?” The
Monster lives to make your own life hell, and he’s good at it. From
screaming at you in front of the customers to lying about your results
to engaging in borderline criminal harassment, The Monster repeatedly
demonstrates that has no pity, human decency, or shame. He’s the worst
boss around, hands down, and we’re sorry for anyone who has to deal with
him.
How to make him love you: Unfortunately, with this one you
just have to run. Get out. There’s no hope for improvement when you work
for someone who has no scruples at all.
9. The Number Cruncher
Distinguishing characteristics: Incredible Excel skills, a calculator watch
What they do: The Number Cruncher’s best quality is her
ability to break things down into measurable statistics — and sometimes,
that means the actual employees, too. The Number Cruncher can only
read math, and if your performance appears to be declining on paper rest
assured you will get a lecture, even if you’ve been working as hard as
you can. Ever feel like you are “just a number?” We’re here to confirm
that you definitely are.
How to make her love you: Give her something she can understand: Numbers. Track your successes (and
your failures) with painstaking detail and fanatical devotion. Even if
it’s a chore in the immediate future, your data mining will pay off and
you will have something on paper that proves you’ve been working hard,
even if your efforts haven’t been working. Who knows, her approach
might teach you something!
10. The Innovator
Distinguishing characteristics: Brainstorming sessions, expensive toys, subscription to Entrepreneur magazine
What they do: The Innovator’s head is full of big ideas, and
he wastes no time dreaming them up and then making sure they actually
come true. Great for business, but it usually means you get no life
outside the office because you’re the one actually making his dream come
to life. The pros? This boss can be incredibly charismatic and
inspiring, and truly cares about the work. The cons? Sometimes it
seems like the only thing this boss cares about is work. Hope that’s all you care about, too!
How to make him love you: Work hard and show commitment, but
keep your sense of self outside of work. Remind the boss that the
outside world does exist: Ask The Innovator about his weekend, his
children (if he has any, which is a total mystery) about any hobby he
has outside work. After you’re done chitchatting, give your all and The
Innovator will respect your work and hopefully, your own need for
work-life balance.
11. The Tuft Hunter
Distinguishing characteristics: The CEO’s wardrobe, car, and haircut.
What they do: In the old days, a tuft hunter was a nobleman’s
parasite, one who tried to curry favor with the rich and powerful in
order to gain favor or influence. The Tuft Hunter as a boss, however,
is always looking for her own next promotion. Does that mean she’ll
create an opening for you once she makes it up that ladder — or are you
merely a rung on her own to be stepped on? That’s something only The
Tuft Hunter knows. You’ll probably find out too late.
How to make her love you: Do everything in your power to make
The Tuft Hunter look good, and you’ll be one step closer to a promotion
of your very own. Watch her back and tell her every bit of news that
you come across from upper management and you’ll earn her respect and
maybe even her loyalty — if she has any.
12. The Patronizer
Distinguishing characteristics: Terrible computer skills, degree in law or medicine
What they do: If you’ve worked for someone who explained how
to turn your computer on or how to change the toner on the printer,
you’ve experienced The Patronizer. The Patronizer makes sure you know
exactly how much time and effort it takes for him just to grace you with
his presence every morning. He leaves you to your own devices mostly,
but is sure to micromanage the simplest and most mundane tasks whenever
he gets the opportunity.
How to make him love you: Keep your eye on the ball, whether
it’s getting better at your job or getting a foot out the door. If you
feel you are being made to look stupid, you can interrupt The Patronizer
mid-sentence during one of his boring lectures by saying, “I already
know how to do that, but I am interested what you think about …” If the
condescending behavior just doesn’t stop, or if he’s being outright
rude, it’s important to tell The Patronizer to knock it off. The
Patronizer believes you’re beneath him, and when you show him you’re
not, you’ll gain his respect.
Note: For some reason, admins and secretaries experience The Patronizer more often than any other profession. Some people assume that you’re there in a support position because you are stupid or can’t get any other job (like it takes a rocket scientist to be in sales!). In some cases, it’s best to kill The Patronizer with kindness, especially since that bubbly, outgoing response comes so naturally to those in the administrative trade. Use your natural ability to be nice to anyone (no matter how rude they are) to good use, and keep your eyes peeled for an employer who treats you right!
Note: For some reason, admins and secretaries experience The Patronizer more often than any other profession. Some people assume that you’re there in a support position because you are stupid or can’t get any other job (like it takes a rocket scientist to be in sales!). In some cases, it’s best to kill The Patronizer with kindness, especially since that bubbly, outgoing response comes so naturally to those in the administrative trade. Use your natural ability to be nice to anyone (no matter how rude they are) to good use, and keep your eyes peeled for an employer who treats you right!
13. The Nitpicker
Distinguishing characteristics: Fierce attention to detail, red pens, lots of spare time.
What they do: The Nitpicker is a micro-manager who likes to
control all of your work, all the time. Did you save the company money
on office supplies? It’s not nearly enough. Work hard on a killer
presentation? There’s a punctuation error on the 10th slide. Nothing
you do is ever good enough for The Nitpicker, and that can cause your
own faith in your abilities to slip. You’ll spend all your time
second-guessing yourself instead of innovating.
How to make her love you: Instead of letting the Nitpicker
drain you of all motivation, learn to work by your own standards. Try
finding someone else in the company to be your mentor, because you
surely won’t get coaching out of her, unless it’s to point out all your
faults. You might also try working one step ahead of The Nitpicker,
detailing every single thing you do, so you’ll be ready for the
inevitable barrage of questions.
What to Do When Your Boss Is Wrong
Featured Author:
Renee Weisman
More articles from this author:
Renee Weisman | Excelle
We’ve all been there. You’ve been handling a client, solving a
problem, preparing a major presentation, planning a critical marketing
meeting, and your boss or supervisor disagrees with your approach. The
boss tells you how to do it, and you are convinced that it won’t work.
What do you do? Do you cave in and do it his or her way knowing it is going to fail? Do you plunge ahead with your approach, knowing he or she won’t like it?
Neither answer is good for your career or for your business. So, how should a hard-working, talented, and dedicated employee respond?
How you approach this prickly problem has a lot to do with the relationship between you and your supervisor and with your experience base, but there are some basic questions to answer that may help you break the loggerjam. I am assuming in this discussion that there is no harassment issue or other underlying problem and that you both disagree, perhaps strongly, on the right approach.
Question number one : Have I done this before? Is there evidence that would support my position?
Question number two : Is there evidence that supports your boss’s position? If you consulted with other experts in the field (without telling them you are in disagreement with your boss) which approach would they favor?
Question number 3 : Can you both be right? Is there some compromise you could make that would take the best of both of your approaches?
After thinking this issue through, you may be more willing to change slightly but what about your boss? Is there a way to get him or her to budge? Yes, if you do it right.
First of all, schedule some time with your supervisor and have the conversation in private. You never want to make the boss look bad in front of others. Any disagreements you might have are between the two of you, not the entire department.
In the meeting, thank your supervisor for taking the time to discuss the project. Tell him or her you have been considering the approaches. Then state what you believe is your boss’s approach and state its merits. (There has to be something good you can say about it, however much you think it is wrong.) When he or she agrees, then say, there are just a couple of things we should do to improve upon the approach.
When he or she asks what, suggest one small thing that you think would open up the discussion and allow you to propose an alternative. If he or she is amenable, work in a second suggestion. Keep the discussion going, making it a give-and-take as opposed to an argument. Keep it about the business, keep to the facts and keep calm. If you get emotional, your argument will lose its impact.
Prepare for this meeting by thinking out the key elements you want to discuss and perhaps modify. If you get to some areas where you simply can’t agree, then unless it is life threatening, dishonest or career breaking, see if there is some common ground on which you can agree. Don’t threaten, and don’t cower. Treat your boss with respect and you will get it in return.
Hopefully this exchange will help you see both sides of the issue and make whatever endeavor you are working on that much stronger. But if you can’t agree then you have two choices. Either you follow what boss says or you tell him or her you want to try the alternative and are willing to live with the consequences.
If at that point, he or she still says no, then again, unless it involves safety or integrity, you need to do it his or her way and give it your all. You will gain more respect by taking something you don’t necessarily agree with and making it a success, than by taking it on and secretly hoping it will fail. Whether is it because of the approach or not, being associated with a failure is never good for your career.
http://excelle.monster.com
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